Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Mista Jaycee's Rant on The Greatest, Bestestes Candies in the whole wide world that Y'all copied from Compton! So There!

Hey Y'all
So I was having a deep, I mean, super deep, heavy philosophical type, esoteric discussion on the really good candy. My Wife, is a lil bit older than me so she thinks she's got it on lock when it comes to the greatest, bestest, super duper type ish. But she don't know!
And just so you know, for the record. Just cause you were old enough to dance to the Ohio Players and Earth Wind and Fire and carry the cool Afro Fist pick don't mean y'all know every damn thang! Besides, Polyester and the Pet Rock came out in the 70's too. So there!
Well, wait....Death before Disco!
Gotta recite the pledge ya know. On with Mista Jaycee's List of the Greatest, Bestest Candy! Feel free to join in, make suggestions although I think I got it on lock!

If You didn't own a Pez Dispenser You was deprived!

The Ring Pop!
The Ring Pop! It worked on so many levels. It was the cool, Mack like. Pinkie ring. Cute Lil gyals, dug em and dug you for a moment. The Cute Lil Gyals thanks to 3D ripened to become beautiful young Sistahs, still roxxin the ring pop but with an extra mass appeal. ( WINK) Oh, come on, none of us was seeing or doing nothing except getting hot and bothered watching Select TV or On after dark. BE Real!

Ok, My Wife totally digs these! I don't get em myself, but Y'all chime in.

The Candy Necklace!

Now, this was probably the first piece of jewelry any of us owned. It was overpriced, cheaply made, sugary and gaudy as all hell. Then after it got wet, your hair got stuck on it but you ate it anyway. ( Admit it) AHHHH! Good Times!

The Matching Bracelet! ( read the above caption)

Candy that lasted all day! Had to have the Toofis of a G to eat this!
Oh, one of my first loves! Now Laters! The Apple were the greatest! They were Hard but we loved them and if you got a stale pack they were chewy and good. Now they jacked em up and changed the recipe. They ruined!The Big Hunk! You had to have them G Teefis to eat this!

Polla Seeds Or Sunflower Seeds!
The one that filled a thousand and one detentions! Still going strong! Still filling detentions! Still getting kids in trouble during Church Services but boy do they ever make your breath stink!
Breath just be Howling!
Hubba Bubba Bubble Gum!
Again, got you in trouble in church and filled detentions in schools all over America.

The Straight up no nonsense pure unadulterated Funkadelic candy! It was Hot! Good to have at the movies!

The Jolly Rancher! Same thang as the ring pop but more bang for ya buck! And if you really grown and sexxxy the fire stick was the bomb!

Jolly Joe's was the Original Hub City Compton California Candy! Sugar! Water! Purple! Nothin else!

The Absolute Top Dawg! Lemonheads! The best 10 cent candy for 35 cents! Hey! It was marked up but so totally worth it!

Ok, You got to be a real Candy connoisseur to know the original Fun dip! The one with the hard candy stick and the three flavors that would mix together. Another one they tampered with and jacked!

Boston Baked Beans!
Again, Best 10 cent candy you could get for 35 cents!
Candy Lipz! I just like lips!
Ok, tell me your list so I can tell ya how wrong ya is! (Smile)
BE Careful! BE Mindful! BE Careful!


reedwrites said...

wait you forgot a couple...

Bubbletape and/or Big League Chew


pixie straws

Mista Jaycee said...

Big League chew was like Reggie, cool but it came at the end of the 70's. Now Pixie Sticks oh yeah, I forgot those.

Pixie sticks and the super pixie stick with a soda and oh yeah you were up all night!

And Pop Rocks!

Funms-the rebirth said...

ok, i so dont know most of these stuff but the candy necklace, hell yeah! and hubba bubba, i could have been kidnapped with them

Mista Jaycee said...

Hey Fumms,
Good to see ya. Well, since you don't know these candies then what can you add? Come on I gottsta know!

Miss.Stefanie said...

Mmmmmmmm candy!

S A V V Y F. Baybeh! said...

MAAANNNN!! I remember MANY a days going to the licka store for MamaSAV to get her an Abba Zabba or a Big Hunk. She LOVED those teeth-fucker-uppers.

Candy necklaces and bracelets were my THIZZANG! I used to be the stickiest neck ninja ya EVER did see!

I remember I used to feel RICH if I had Big League Chew or Fun Dip! LOL!
Those were the DAYS!

Mista Jaycee said...

Were the dayz? They are the dayz now! I can still get all that candy. I'm thinking bout getting some boston baked beans now! And Pixie Sticks oooohhh hoooo hooo if I do them again, Y'all have to do an intervention on me. (wink)

Coogie Cruz said...

I use to like Nerds but wasn't allowed to eat them with my momma because I will drop them and they will roll all over and make a mess but because they were small it took forever to find them all and clean, lol. (There were a lot of foods I could't eat because of the mess they could make, like sunflower seeds). I love me some ring pops though!Never liked Boston Baked Beans, Lemonheads, Fun Dips, Candy Lips and the candy jewelry. They tasted old but looked pretty!

Mista Jaycee said...

My daughter can't have nerds of polla seeds in the house cause of the mess. (Laughing) Oh well she's older now but she still gets the side eye.