Saturday, February 7, 2009

Karaoke! Just add Liquor! No Good Can Come of It!

In the September 21, 1997 episode of The Simpsons, "The City of New York Vs. Homer Simpson", Homer Simpson's recollection of his first trip to New York City ended with his falling in the sewer and quoting, "...and that's when the C.H.U.D.s came at me." Marge responds: "Of course you'll have a bad impression of New York if you only focus on the pimps and the C.H.U.D.s." Wiki.

Liquor mixed with Karaoke! No good can come of it! Jaycee
Have you ever heard the sound a butterfly makes when it screams? Jaycee

It wasn't that long ago that Peabo Bryson got called a hater cause he said that R. Kelly couldn't sing! Jaycee
So, like ok, here goes! I went to see my daughter's game and afterwards we decided to hit this popular Mexican resturant for dinner. Now the food was good. I personally, had the sour cream enchiladas and a Cadillac margarita but the liquor could not brace me for what occured next!

It was Friday night, the place was packed, and rain is pouring outside. It's Karaoke Night inside the bar. AGGGGGH!

Have you ever heard a butterfly screaming?
What there was no sign posted! No Sign! There was no sign Darn it!

Ok, so now that you got that visual in your head running on a continuous loop; I had a mouth full of food when I heard this chick belting out Chaka Khan's Sweet Thing!

Mental Note: Karaoke, people who can't sing, singing songs that are either too cheesy or too sacred to be sung by an non professional. Oh, and add Liquor! Lots of it!

Now, she's singing Chaka Khan's Sweet Thing so loud that people in the restaurant are now laughing, choking or taking bets on if she's gonna try to hit the note! You know, the Note!

For the record... She did! She tried to hit The Note! I won the bet by the way. Don't hate!

You know the real issue for me was not that she was singing Chaka Khan's Sweet Thing but I got the feeling she had never heard it. She heard Mary's version of Sweet Thing! Same song, Yes! But not the Same thing! Get it?

So, we laughed! It was cool. I heard an ok version of Lionel Richies/Kenny Rogers Lady that wasn't bad but when this one group of Ladies decided to sing Labelle's Lady Marmalade then the hilarity was reaching a fever pitch!

Just add Liquor, that should sum up Karaoke!

So the night ended when I began to hear someone attempting to sing Minnie Ripperton's Loving You! Oh Gawd! For all y'all who don't know, Minnie Ripperton could see so high she would shatter glasses during her performances.
Lalalala lalala lalala lala la lala la Do do do dood AHHHHHHHHHHH!
I ran to get the truck! I could hear the crowd and the sound of a poor lil Kittie being swung by it's tail!

And that's when the CHUD's Came.......

BE Mindful! BE Prayerful! BE Careful!



reedwrites said...


Last time I added liquor to karaoke, I ended up doing JJ Fad Supersonic (which works for me since I talk fast), but um...the words disappeared off the screen. So I started pulling lyrics out of my butt and made it work. LMAO.

Miss.Stefanie said...

I love karoke...Last time I sang that ish, I was drunk off my ass and singing renditions of Baby Got back...Ha! Goodtimes.

Lyn said...

The other night one of the poor souls on Amer Idol tried for Minnie's "Loving You". Don't ever try to find it!!!
Looking for Vines....

Anonymous said...

LOL I love Karaoke!

Kit (Keep It Trill) said...

...and a good time was had by all!

Afrobabe said...

Lmao...will never do karokee again...been cured by ur description...glad to see a non political post ;)

Mista Jaycee said...

LOL! Supersonic? Oh that had to be hilarious!

Stef, Baby got Back? Oh my theme song!

Hey Glennisha,
It's ok to love it. It's not for me.

Afrobabe, so glad to see ya. Remember in the age of You tube just add liquor can be dangerous.


And that's why I don't Ahhh this cracks me up

Blah Blah Blah said...


Sidenote: My word verification word is BINGE...
I think this is a prophecy of some sort... just sayin', if the blog gods show it...then it must be so!

Anonymous said...

Very funny, I am outside of the US at the moment and Karaoke is very popular here...

Una Persona said...

:)) i have noticed that tone deaf people are the biggest fans of karaoke